Monthly Archives: August 2012

The Contender (Erin: 4.25 Stars, Bret: 5 Stars)

It’s easy to watch a movie and deliver a review without thinking about the 100s of thousands of little moving pieces that it takes to make a movie successful.

Story, direction, proper casting, dialogue, lighting, sound, editing, craft service table, whether or not the star has had an affair with the married director (Kristen Stewart films) and a host of other things that we are forgetting or don’t want to take the time to mention.

They actually make a pretty cute Amish couple.

One piece that can either make or break a film is the marketing of said film. And that is where our story begins with The Contender.

The Contender is a great film. It takes a topic (the nomination of a female senator to replace a dead Vice President and the confirmation process) that isn’t all that interesting and turns it into a fascinating tale of morality, principal and trust.

What it is not is a “first rate thriller.”

The marketing for The Contender, however, is a first rate example of how even a very good film that misrepresents itself to its audience can flame out.

Although the film has an incredible cast (including Oscar nominations for both Joan Allen and Jeff Bridges with Gary Oldman being absolutely robbed of one and that’s setting aside Sam Elliott who is fantastic as well), terrific plot, excellent writing (movies like this can easily feature stilted, inorganic dialogue, The Contender completely avoids that) and is wonderfully shot and edited, the marketing of the film makes it out to be something it is not and that dooms it from the outset.

Even the title doesn’t make a ton of sense. The Nominee or something to that effect probably would have been more fitting.

“We LOVE it! People will have no idea what it’s about!” — The Contender Marketing Team

In the end, if you are looking for a tense, political thriller, you are probably going to want to look elsewhere. If you want an excellent (if slightly idealistic and definitely left-leaning) film about the political process, The Contender comes very highly recommended by your neighborhood RockMovieProject.

Four and a quarter Stars from Erin, 5 Stars from Bret.

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RockMovieProject Spambag #3

Wizards? Check. Humanoid robots? Check. Guitar lessons? Check.

You know it has to be time for another rendition of America’s favorite running post gimmick when we get comments about those topics and more.

Disclaimer:  Real comments from fake people.

Thanks for any other wonderful post. Where else could anyone get that kind of info in such a perfect manner of writing? I’ve a presentation next week, and I’m on the search for such info. 

As always, we start with a compliment. As you can imagine, fair viewer, there are lots of places to get this kind of info, but in such a perfect manner of writing? No, that certainly is difficult to replicate. We wish you luck on your presentation next week!

Wizards usually flaunt a robe and a high printed with stars and moons, looking at a crystal ball.

Oh, okay.

Just look at that smug, moon and stars robe flaunting son of a b*tch…

Hi. Aprox by the year 2020 a laptop will reach the human brain petnotial for processing data which means that there is a huge market waiting for hundreds of billions dollars to be sold or invested in humanoid robots and intelligent systems and the beginning of the bigger industry ever maid in human history. Search on Google luisbeck007 you will find the most complete humanoid robot list in the World, good information and interesting issues. 

Your comment, while borderline incoherent, certainly brings up an interesting topic. While we have to say that the odds of us Googling luisbeck007 are very slim, we appreciate your bringing this potential humanoid robot uprising to our attention. We’ll get back to you for our Terminator 2 review.

I have been browsing on-line more than three hours nowadays, but I by no means found any attention-grabbing article like yours. It’s lovely price enough for me. In my opinion, if all web owners and bloggers made good content as you did, the internet will probably be much more helpful than ever before. 

/Blushing

Awwww, shucks… We are glad to do our part to make the internet more helpful than ever before.

I can’t imagine why anybody would give you less than 5 stars.

But wait! There’s more to this comment!

It makes tuning my guitar so quick, easy and accurate.

Check that out! Not only is the RockMovieProject great for killing time and getting honest and forthright movie reviews, it can also help you tune a guitar, apparently!

“Before my guitar sounded lousy, then I used the RockMovieProject to tune it. Now I wear a scarf and play Tom Petty cover songs like every other hipster! Thanks RockMovieProject!”

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Coming to America (Erin: 4.25 Stars, Bret: 4.25 Stars)

In some of our posts, we struggle to search for an angle to discuss and then just wind up blathering on like idiots. For Coming to America, a film that at least dips its toe into “Comedy Classic” waters, there are a multitude of them.

We could talk about how great Eddie Murphy is in this movie in what could be considered his last REALLY funny role before his career went off the rails. Murphy is great throughout and displays the comic timing that made him a superstar.

We could attack this post from the angle of how this is the first Murphy film in which he portrayed more than one role (in fact, he plays four different characters in the movie) and how it was a harbinger of (mostly) bad things to come. Murphy has played multiple roles in six movies since Coming to America, with performances ranging from decent (The Nutty Professor) to horrendous (Norbit). In Coming to America, whether it’s Akeem, Randy Watson and Sexual Chocolate or the two old barbershop guys, the more Murphy, the better.

We could discuss how, for 116 minutes, Arsenio Hall held his own against an in-his-prime Eddie Murphy; an incredible feat.

Or how, thanks to its commercials, Soul Glo might be the funniest fake product in movie history.

Just let it shine.

The angle we’ve settled on after a bit of a rambling beginning? How awesome is James Earl Jones’ voice?

If you could buy a voice on EBay, we figure there would be four top sellers: James Earl Jones, Patrick Stewart, Morgan Freeman and Bobcat Goldthwait.

Just for comedy’s sake.

Everyone talks about how great a narrator Morgan Freeman is and how his is the voice of God, but no one ever seems to mention James Earl Jones, and, since Bret and Erin are on opposite sides of the issue, we figured it would be best to let the 10’s of 10’s of people that check this site out vote on who has the best voice.

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Cloverfield (Erin: 4.75 Stars, Bret: 4 Stars)

You’ll have to forgive us for our lame, half-hearted attempt to replicate the shaky-cam effect from Cloverfield at the beginning of this review.

J.J. Abrams attempt to give the U.S. its own version of Godzilla, however, scored very highly with the usually stingy Erin Rock.

The 4.75 Stars given to Cloverfield marks her fourth-highest review yet through 54 films.

Higher even than the movie that features this impossibly cool screenshot, if you can believe that.

For a movie to beat Center Stage in Erin’s eyes, it must be a high quality film (or, depending on your point-of-view, it must be better than one of the worst movies ever made).

Cloverfield falls short of being a classic horror movie (think Jaws or, if you are Bret, Halloween), but is a solid film that used the found footage concept extremely well before it became incredibly annoying. Every other film nowadays is a found-footage film and Cloverfield has to accept some of the blame for that phenomenon.

An incredible 4.75 Stars from Erin and a respectable 4 Stars from Bret.

An artist’s depiction of Erin and her Stars.

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